The fans in Boston were naturally crazy with joy at the historic win of the Boston Red Sox in the World Series in 2004. The celebration was wild and raucous, and it expressed itself also, sadly, in vandalization and the resultant death of a student from a fatal encounter with the police. The monthly meeting of the Harvard Chaplains took place shortly after that win.
In the course of the meeting, Methodist chaplain Scott Campbell remarked almost casually what I later felt to be a profound observation. With a wry smile he said that while the religions of the world provided enough tools to help us deal with pain and sorrow, he was not sure whether they had much to say about how we should deal with joy.
That set me thinking about joy and sorrow—and what follow are a few thoughts that have been running through my mind over the years. It seems to me that conversations on how joy and sorrow are understood would be immensely productive and helpful both academically and practically.
It is possible to say that there are two types of joys and sorrows. One type is existential and the other type is temporal. Temporal joys and sorrows are parts of our everyday experience. Temporal sorrow can result from any of the factors such as lack of shelter, food or clothing, lack of education, loss of a job or power or position, betrayal by a friend, and so on. The two main characteristics of temporal sorrow are (1) it is not universal, that is to say, not everyone in the world suffers from every one of these temporal forms, and (2) temporal sorrow, no matter how intense, can be eliminated. It may take time and much effort but still there are ways to overcome it.
Temporal joys can result from any of the factors such as friendship, love, the fulfillment of a longstanding desire, financial gain, and acquisition of power. Temporal joys have similar two characteristics: (1) they are not universal, that is to say, not everyone in the world has every one of these joys, and (2) each of these temporal joys waxes and wanes, and it does end sooner or later. None of these is eternal.
Our whole life can end up shuttling between the two experiences: temporal sorrow and temporal joy. The trouble is that they always follow each other. They form a package. We would like to have unending joy and be permanently free from sorrow. But that is just not possible. We cannot have just one of them. We either take or reject both. If we take both, our life will go on pretty much the way it has so far, a ride with its joy-ups and sorrow-downs. If we are brave enough to reject both and explore other possibilities, we become aware of the existential forms of joy and sorrow.
A brief aside here. Although both joy and sorrow seem to be a part of life, some of the greatest minds have disagreed with that characterization. Buddha spoke of life as nothing but sorrow (duḥkha). In the Gītā (8.15, 9. 33) Krishna describes this world as an abode of sorrow (duḥkhālaya) and joyless (asukha). Clearly, both Buddha and Krishna saw temporal joy as merely another form of sorrow. They pointed to a higher path, a higher state, that is beyond sorrow—the state which brings existential joy.
I am using the word “existential” here not in a philosophical sense but in a very literal way. By existential I mean whatever is a part of our very existence. Since we exist as human beings at present, existential for us means something that cannot be separated from our human identity. So what are the characteristics of these intrinsic, or existential, forms of joy and sorrow? There are at least two: (1) they are universal, that is to say, every one is entitled to them, and (2) they cannot be overcome easily, because they are inherent in our existence.
At least three forms of existential sorrow come immediately to mind and all of them relate to the body: illness, old age, and death. Sri Krishna refers to these explicitly in the Gītā (13. 8):
जन्म-मृत्यु-जरा-व्याधि-दु:खदोषानुदर्शनम् ।
Janma-mṛtyu-jarā-vyādhi-duḥkha-doṣa-anudarśanam.
“(Among the means to knowledge is) reflecting on the painful defects associated with birth, death, aging, and illness.”
The inevitable pain connected with the processes of birth and death, aging and sickness, is universal. No one is exempt from these processes. Add to these the forms of painful experience related to the mind, such as anxiety, stress and fear. Intrinsic sorrow is connected with our very existence as human beings. It is universal. This is what Buddha and Krishna were referring to when they described our present experience as simply sorrow, not sorrow and joy.
But, obviously, this is only a part of the story. Alongside intrinsic sorrow exists intrinsic joy, but these two don’t alternate the way temporal joy and sorrow do. If intrinsic sorrow is associated with our existence as human beings, intrinsic joy is associated with our existence as spiritual beings.
Is there a way to transcend our humanity and touch the core of our divinity? When we look deeply into the temporal nature of our joys and sorrows, we become aware of the intrinsic sorrow enveloping our human situation. Only with this awareness and the longing to overcome the sorrow can our spiritual quest begin in the real sense. What this involves is simple to describe but tough to practice. All that we need to do is change our self-perception. We should start looking at ourselves in a radically different way.
We have learnt to look upon ourselves as human beings. That wasn’t difficult at all. It seemed most natural to do so. Now we need to start seeing ourselves as divine beings. It won’t feel natural in the beginning, but if we persist, we’ll begin to taste success. It won’t look awkward or unnatural after a while. We may even begin to enjoy the experience! Can I make an effort to remember every conscious moment of my life that I am the spirit, I am the Ātman, not this “cage” of body and mind, the ego and the senses, in which I am trapped? If I can do that, the problem is solved.
My intrinsic sorrow will then vanish and I will begin to experience intrinsic joy. Nothing and no one in the world can give me intrinsic joy. And nothing and no one can take it away from me. Only I can give it to myself. It does not come from outside. It comes entirely from inside. I experience intrinsic joy when I encounter the core of my true existence, when I get in touch with my true identity, which is defined in different ways in different religions. Thus, it is possible, for instance, to say that when I have a true experience of God and see myself spontaneously and effortlessly as a child of God, then I experience intrinsic joy—a joy that is one with my existence as God’s child. It’s a joy that no one can take away from me—ever.
Using Vedantic terms, intrinsic joy can also be understood in terms of realizing my identity as the Ātman. The intrinsic joy belongs to the Ātman and intrinsic sorrow belongs to body/mind. So long as my “I” feels its identity with body/mind, the sorrows connected with body/mind are “my” sorrows. When my “I” is identified with the Ātman, the bliss connected with the Ātman is “my” joy. Well, it is more than “my” joy. I am the joy, period.
Even a fleeting taste of that joy of God is enough for us to see through the limitations of all temporal joys and sorrows. The best way to handle all of our joys and sorrows in daily life is to focus our energies in seeking the joy that comes from God—or what amounts to the same, our own true self. It is a joy that is like no other. It is the joy that “passeth understanding.”